Love Conquers All – Even Fear
Have you ever been in a relationship that you don't feel free to be who you are? This has become an actual segment in today's society. If you were to google this subject you'd get all sorts of answers to conquer the fear that has been holding you at bay.
Symptoms Of A Relationship Ruled By Fear
Without a doubt you probably grew up in a home that was loving and your parents tried to do all they knew how to get you to the adult phase of life. They did this by giving you the good that they found in their parents techniques and then applied other methods from other parents.
This is typically how we learn to become parents. But there's a huge demographic that forgot to give their child the extra dose of security that's needed when we don't feel safe. We all have that inner critic telling us exactly how wrong, stupid, untalented, we are. And the women always seem to fight with the fashion of the day and keeping up their looks.
So this all leads to one thing that we believe is the root of all these things mentioned above.
Fear and Insecurity
These emotions can make a person lash out and do some crazy things from an outsiders perspective. They also do these things to the very people that they love. This all seems like something that isn't very logical to us.
They love us…. yet they hurt us. hmm.
Perhaps these things happen to them because of a few things in their past.
Usually it's a toxic relationship in their past that has scarred them and created these wounds on our emotions.
How To Fix Your Emotions
The first and most important thing to do to fix your emotions is to simply start loving yourself. Realize whose you are and what He says about you.
If you don't love yourself and find it difficult, you may want to check into a meditation that focusses on the very words that God said about you. Here are some examples:
- I am worthy
- I am healthy
- I am strong
- I am perfect
- I am forgiven
- I am loved
- I am creative
- I am free
Start saying these to yourself on a daily basis morning and night. Then check back on yourself after a week, 2 weeks, a month.
You'll be amazed!
Next, you'll find that you're probably not that patient with your spouse. Give them the very patience that you would want from them. I like to say that in every action there is a reaction. So start off with the action that will return a reaction that you'd want to receive.
If At First, You Don't Understand
Jess talks about this in episode #4 when she starts to think that Jon is a mindreader and don't we wish that were true for all of us. Life would be so much easier, wouldn't it?
But the best thing to do when you don't think that your spouse understands you or vice versa is to… ASK QUESTIONS! (said in unison).
Think About Others Before Your Needs
This should be a no brainer but it really does seem that more and more people are all in this to win it at the expense of others.
That really begs the question, “what do you really get out of this life when you're stomping on others – and your spouse too?”In all that you do, think about others and how you can serve them best and your needs will be met far above your imagination" ~Jon & Jess Click To Tweet
So, if you're thinking about the things that you want in life, think about the space you're providing for your spouse. Make that space a place for him/her to flourish. They want to be who they are. Maybe that's not the perfect version that you like all the time, but it's who they are.
Don't worry, they will change. It's a given and most of the time they change for the love in their life and for the better.
Until next time…
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