
When we have a problem or question to be answered, most of us try to work it out in our own strength. That's why when you struggle, we need to be looking to God first!
When We Try To Figure It Out On Our Own Power
In chapter three of his book, “Make Fear Bow“, Gary V. Whetstone calls this trusting in the arm of the flesh.
We tell ourselves I've got this or I'll figure it out. We do everything we can think of to solve the problem on our own. Gary says that this produces fear. Then, when we cannot think of anything else to try, we finally pray and ask God for help.
However, whenever we have a problem God wants us to bring it to him first.
We don't have to worry that we will look weak if we trust the Lord with everything. We aren't bothering him if we go to him with every little and big thing. In fact, he wants us to bring things to him.
It pleases God when his children look to him as Daddy.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart (Proverbs 3:5) has a new meaning for me now. It means to trust him with everything, not just when I can't see the answer.
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The best way to handle arguments
Diffuse the situation as fast as possible. Have you noticed that when you go to bed mad at your spouse or anyone really, you have a greater chance at dreaming about them? …and those dreams are never good!
eliminate any doubt or confusion in your mind to avoid times when you struggle. Well it seems that this can be easier said that done but how we handle our thoughts is the key to eliminating doubt and confusion. One of the best ways to handle this is to communicate with your spouse by asking questions so that you really get what they are saying. This alone will eliminate confusion and doubt.
However, I know that we both have times that we need to ask a question(s) about what the other person said to us so that we know what is being said and even the motivation behind why it was said. That's why we always need to talk to your spouse intelligently until a resolution is made.
Never run away from issues; rather excuse yourself to get your mind right and reconvene in a short time. Growing up, this was the method that was taught to Jon as his mother would get uncomfortable with the subject and then either change the subject or leave the area. This is running away from problems and not dealing with the issue at hand. If you intend on making this good, you need to revisit this issue with the person you are talking to originally.